your eyes are lying to you (and that’s okay)

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part 1: perception, frequency, and why neutral is underrated

yaar, have you ever met someone who seemed amazing at first – good looks, nice perfume, smooth talk – and then a month later you’re like “what was i thinking?”

happened to me last year.

met this guy at a coworking space in indiranagar. sharp dressing. talked about his startup like he was the next steve jobs. everyone around him was impressed. me too, honestly.

but something felt off. couldn’t put my finger on it.

few weeks later, i saw him yell at a chai guy for spilling a little water. then i saw him ghost a friend who helped him with funding. small things. but they added up.

the impressive version of him? that was just the filter i was looking through. the real him was underneath the whole time.

this post is about that filter. and how to stop being fooled by it.

first, a weird fact about your eyes

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they’re kinda useless.

seriously. your eyes can only see a tiny slice of what’s real. something about wavelengths between 380 to 700 nanometers. outside that? nothing. infrared, uv, radio waves – invisible.

google it. nasa has whole papers on it. credit to them.

same reason space photos look green in one camera and blue in another. same reason a bee sees your shirt completely differently.

your eyes don’t show you reality. they show you one version.

and your brain does the same trick every single day.

the sea is constant. you are not.

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take the arabian sea. same water. same fish. same coral.

• a fisherman sees: “where’s my catch?”
• a shark sees: “where’s my food?”
• a tourist sees: “nice photos.”
• an instagrammer sees: “is this vibrant enough for a reel?”
• a capitalist sees: “how do i charge for this view?”

sea doesn’t care. it just is.

but each person’s mind filters the sea down to the one thing that matters to them.

that filter – not the sea – decides if they’re happy or miserable.

fisherman catches fish? happy. no fish? sad. sea didn’t change.

same with people.

when you meet someone, your brain filters them through your current mood, your past experiences, your insecurities, your desires.

• if you’re lonely, you see a potential partner.
• if you’re ambitious, you see a connection.
• if you’re insecure, you see someone to impress.

but the person? they’re just there. containing everything – good and bad.

you just chose to see one thing.

frequency of people: vibe + patterns

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people give off a “frequency.” not in a magical way. i mean vibe. energy. whatever you want to call it.

hard to explain. some people feel warm. some feel draining. some feel like they’re performing. you just feel it.

but the observable part? behavior patterns.

watch how someone treats:

• a waiter who messes up their order
• their mom on the phone
• a junior who made a mistake
• themselves when they’re angry

do they shout? do they shut down? do they blame? do they own it?

those patterns are their frequency leaking out.

most people don’t notice because they’re distracted by:

• good looks
• fancy clothes
• expensive perfume
• smooth talk
• impressive stories

that’s the coral. pretty on top. but underneath? the real sea.

neutral aura: how to stop being a puppet

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here’s the trap.

when you meet someone, their frequency tries to pull yours.

happy person? you feel lighter. angry person? you feel tense. manipulative person? you start second-guessing yourself.

it’s normal. human brains are wired for emotional contagion.

but if you want to think clearly – without being manipulated or swept away – you need a neutral base.

not positive. not negative. just… neutral.

what does that look like in real life?

you pause. you step back. you stop reacting. you become a cctv camera watching the scene instead of a player in it.

you still feel things. you just don’t let those feelings decide your next move.

how do you learn this? practice. annoying but true.

• sit alone. audit your own patterns first. (our stillness breathing helps with this – not selling, just saying)
• watch your emotions without acting on them
• when someone pulls you into their drama, pause. ask: “what do they actually want from me?”
• collect data before deciding

after a while, you realize:

you don’t have to react to every frequency that hits you.

just observe. then choose.

red flags and green flags? depends on the person

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honestly? there’s no universal list.

some people love dominating partners. some want deep bonding. some want a name-sake relationship while staying independent inside.

different life paths, different needs.

except manipulation. that’s different.

manipulation hides the true self. it makes you see something that isn’t there.

but real talk? a great manipulator can keep the act up forever. and if they make their partner happy until their last breath – who’s to say it was wrong?

i don’t know yaar. people get what they get. a lot of it is luck and karma.

but if you want to reduce your risk of getting played? stop waiting for someone to save you. stop being desperate for validation.

self-validation: become your own cctv camera

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when someone impresses you – with their words, their achievements, their charm – pause.

detach.

ask yourself:

“is this person actually genuine, or are they just good at seeming genuine?”

then test them with small questions.

real examples:

• manager bragging about fake achievements? ask for one specific metric or a failure they overcame. watch them fumble.
• colleague flaunting a fake lavish life? ask about a boring detail of their “luxury trip.” watch them dodge.
• date lying about their perfect life? ask about a time they failed. watch them deflect.

real people admit flaws. performers get uncomfortable.

your gut + small tests = your best shield.

pause before part 2

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this is a lot. i know.

perception, frequency, neutrality, self-validation – not a one-read thing.

if you want to actually digest it, try the stillness breathing. just a few minutes. helps settle the brain before you try to observe others.

part 2 will cover:

• how to profile people without being paranoid
• specific behavioral cues to watch for (the ones i actually use in bangalore)
• how to stay neutral when someone tries to impress or manipulate you
• real-life scenes from indiranagar cafes and office meetings

but only come back after you’ve sat with part 1.

credits:

• human eye visible spectrum (380-700nm) – standard biology. nasa/nih public resources.
• camera frequency and color perception in space imaging – nasa/esa image processing.
• all analogies (fisherman, shark, tourist, instagrammer, capitalist) – my own observations.
• core framework influenced by cognitive psychology and robert sapolsky’s work.

took ai help to clean up typos. my brain works faster than my fingers. xd